Monday, March 01, 2010

Say what?

At first it seemed like a tragedy. A life threatening tragedy. That is what change constitutes doesn't it though?
And so I looked at it from a different angle. It is what you want to make it to be.
I've been wondering why life's passing so fast. These past two years have passed in haste. Too fast, too hazy for me to remember anything that's been worthwhile. Days pass, and this emptiness just keeps on building. There's nothing to do. In fact, there's no inspiration to do. There are several things on my mind, but nothing here. Nothing ever.
It's when you lose things that you realize it's value.
It's also only when you lose things that you learn to live without them.
I've been collecting my personal pictures for the past five years. 2000 of them. And I lost them yesterday. This weekend has been so life changing. I know now what to do. I totally mind-blogged in the bathroom an hour ago. But now somehow the whole flow is gone.
But heck, that's not important. I'm blogging to make a statement now. For everyone to see.
I'm done.
I need to get my ass off this computer, deactivate the stupid blood-sucking time-wasting Facebook account, and move on.
Remember how life used to be without it.
It may seem a petty thing to do but Facebook has been a part of my life. It's the petty things you must discard so as to start afresh. And so this is important for me. To let go of these bad habits and finally make time to do the things I've been yapping and cribbing about doing since I don't know when.
You can't wait for things to happen to you. There's nothing like destiny. I'm so sick and tired of wasting my time and life online. I really need to buck up and DO something. Find my true calling finally. I never thought I'd be so aimless and helpless when I was younger. I had dreams of me being really into life, and dreams of me somewhere that's not here. I'm turning eighteen soon. I need to know what it is I want from this life and figure who I am and stuff.
I am so done. So done.
Vent-typing feels good :)

OKAY. So the Game Plan for now.
  1. Start Reading Again, Full-On.
  2. Study Hard For These Exams.
  3. Do The Chai-Time In The Paper EVERY Day. Apart From Reading The Paper Of Course.
  4. Restart Spanish And Continue Sign Language Learning.
  5. Become A Better Daughter.
  6. Write More.
  7. Experience Again Life In All It's Minuscule Details.
Good Day :)

(Don't you just love it when you happen to make big life changes on the first of a month? :D)

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