Posts

Showing posts from March, 2011

I'm Gonna Get Over You!

It was impulse that brought about what I did that made what everything else that happened, happen. Afterward I was in hysterics. This was followed by a numbness which brought about a kind of depression when everything, life, all seemed futile. The depression got severe with each day. Fighting with the numbness it finally broke into full force a week after. The gravity of what I did started to dawn upon me. It was then that it fully hit me. I felt sad, deeply, immensely sad. For about another week this lasted, didn't feel like just a week though. After this, I felt fine. Just fine. Not happy. But fine. The sad thoughts no longer propelled me to tears. I could handle it. Almost. This is the last week. Come Saturday, it shall be a month since it happened. Goodbyes are always hard. They're harder still when it's one-sided. I won't say I am sorry for myself, but yes I am sorry for what I did. But not sorry enough to want to undo it. I am just sorry enough to wish I

Note From The Dead

Hey Jeremy, You know how they show it in the movies, that when you die, your life flashes before your eyes? Well that's bullshit. Ask me. I know. Because I am dead. If you've not noticed yet. When I died it was no dramatic affair. No colossal fight with it; no fight as such to survive. No loud noises. It was quiet when I died. And quick. I wasn't shot or stabbed. I wasn't murdered. I didn't take my life either. I was too brave for that. You know that. It wasn't a peaceful death. People should not confuse peace with silence. It can be really noisy and yet you can be peaceful. I just died, you know. Of course you don't. You're alive. No fancy heaven with angels after either. No after life. No God lounging in his blue-yellow pajamas on his cloud couch giving you the peace sign. That would be funny. I would laugh at his face if that happened. But it didn't happen. Nothing happened. I'm still here, except I am not here. I will be wait

Inspired by a conversation with the sister

It is never as easily done as it is said it will be done. Things are never what they seem. Most times. All my life I have believed things are what you make them to be. And have thus believed wholeheartedly in the concept that life is indeed simple. That is because I have always wanted it to be simple. Simplex  is not simple. It's complex. But then again it's simple if you can understand and deal with the complex. That is why probably the designation, simplex. Everyone who believes in the simplicity of life would be in total agreement with me if I were to state, not for the first time, that you should do what makes you happy. That forms the base of this simplicity in life. The happiest people are the ones blessed with ignorance and those who live by the simple belief of doing what makes them happy. But the brutal truth of life is that: it's never so easy. There are always hurdles to conquer, the path is rocky, the one that leads to happiness. But then it is supposed to

Something I wrote a few days ago

Studying, or the lack of it, essentially sitting down with the intention to study at some point after my intending to sit to study, always seems to bring out a want to write something, sing something, doing anything, but studying. It's something I have struggled with for years. In my kindergarten teacher's reports, there are remarks that read: "Kamna gets distracted very easily." I guess that explains why my only memories of that time is of me fiddling with clay and talking to my best buddy/first love Koko. I ran a search on him sometime ago, and found, to my great delight that there is a kid star of my age in Lagos today, by the name of Koko. I have a fantasy that one day we shall stumble upon each other when I am revisiting my place of birth and get married in Ikoyi Club. It will not happen. My speaking about it jinxes it. I don't believe in jinxes. Yet I know that somehow when you dream absurdly, or expect absurdly nine times out of ten, you're jinxing i

A Glossary of my Mindless Babbling and Bubbly Quirks

My sister's roomie is a boy from  East Timor My brain's infected with a tumor I am sure I try and make my head for once a little free But instead I swallow the bark of a cinnamon tree I don't enjoy studying about shares Of brokers and markets,  Bears and Bulls , who cares I got yellow-green phlegm in the back of my throat Henna on my hand so I couldn't push a boat Miss Dawson in her skirt plays her guitar out in the cold For fans who couldn't fit in the hall 'cause all tickets were sold The night feels long and over sincere Promising a day that I wish will be clear All day long I've sat and for calm have sought And of you seventy-four and half times I've thought Buildings all around with the sound of the rain But bringing nothing but some breeze and some pain In vain I wait for my mind to just focus I know in my heart it is all simply bogus Almonds are nice and good and healthy I shall from tomorrow pop in my mouth at least t

Hope is sometimes a Stupid thing.

My whole life Explained in just One piece where Darkness only surrounds Under the sea Silent, in waiting

Song!

A few weeks ago  Me and my friends composed a fun song in a  Manali  hotel on a college trip while it was snowing outside. Although we sang in tune, we didn't end up taking a video, and then later I thought we could take a video once we can make a tune on the guitar to go with it. The LYRICS! ☻ Verse 1: It snows over the mountains It snows over the trees It snows everywhere It makes us free-eze! Chorus: Snowman Snow angels Snow flakes We're gonna go out Whatever it takes! Verse 2: Snowing over the houses Snowing over the lakes Come on guys Let's put on some skates! Repeat Chorus! Verse 3: In and out the cold haze Yaks lookin' at us with tha-at fa-ace Air smokin' all over the place Got us horny for a fire blaze! Repeat Chorus! Verse 4: Down and dirty in the snow Ooh we're all wet Takin' it all in the chilly winter blow Downing a Swiss Miss we're soo set! Repeat Chorus!

Kwotz Conteenewed

If you say what you shouldn't say. Don't be surprised when you hear what you shouldn't hear. Normality is merely a matter of consensus, that is, a lot of people think something is right, and so that thing becomes right. Diplomacy is the art of postponing decisions until the problems resolve themselves. Be like the fountain that overflows, not like the cistern that merely contains. The danger of an adventure is worth a thousand days of ease and comfort. The only cure to bitterness is the awareness of life and the medication is the awareness of death. Because the awareness of death encourages us to live more intensely. We don't spontaneously learn that we don't learn that we don't learn. Those who wish to sing, always find a song. The tragedy of life is not that man loses, but that he almost wins. A dream you dream alone is only a dream. A dream you dream together is reality. The mind acts and regrets, the heart acts and forgives.