Kamna's Blog

I worry about - - not having enough space for you - the available mindspace not being fertile enough for your nourishment. Like a middle aged Indian aunty fussing over a houseguest - the confines of my mind not being enough for you to be conjured with the sass and spontaneity they show in movies. No fiery a-HA! moment would be possible because of all my careful caution -  not being open enough and rejecting you without reasoning You're just an idea who will - - pay only as much rent as would be the agreement  - take up only so much space as per my consent  - continue your tenancy for only as long as I want you around  - stay conspicuously absent unless I bring you front and center to the living room of my head You're just an idea who could - - breathe new life into old, likely rusty, chains of thought - delicately or assertively rubbish old comfortable notions  - change the way I feel about the morning sun  - radically impact my sense of humour about life  - fuck with my deep s

Where are the holes in this smooth blanket? Forgotten like long buried potted plants from the nursery Woe is me again as I'm  Swollen and puffy from dental surgery Could you snooze & doze till noon? Dreams of lavender fields & cherry blossom trees Sunday morning feeling all the way through September and June What can be scary at this height? Friskiness and recklessness feeling like buddies Only and always, at the very edge do I dare to recognize my self inflicted plight  Will we sit in pregnant, forebearing silence? Observing with awe new lines on each other's forehead Like in a new school notebook With every swoop of a tightly held pencil a small imperceptible smile of confidence  Would it be ridiculous to splurge on both a new guitar and piano? The frilly white dress is hanging off the window sill in plain sight My hair is fresh, too damp from my longish shower  It's been 2 years since I wrote a song So if you nod now, I may take that to positively mean "no&q

1997 Sipping directly from a gigantic orange while in the backseat of the Jeep on the way to Abidjan 2000 Salivating over a box of mulberries in the Opel Corsa through the ghats on the way to Panchgani 2004 Stuffing myself with fresh Rabdi from a clay pot in the 2nd class sleeper train at Mount Abu station 2005 Snarfing down a quintessential NYC hot dog while admiring the Lady of Liberty on the Staten Island Ferry 2006 Sitting, mind simmering with steaming plastic containers of Gushtaba on my lap in the Shikara on Dal lake 2010 Sampling my first ever Starbucks gazing out of Star Ferry on the way to Tsim Sha Tsui 2011 Sharing a pack of Haldiram's Aloo Bhujiya on the bus to Mysore Palace 2013 Snacking on a Princessa candybar on the Polskibus to Krakow 2013 Satiating my appetite with some Boots meal deal sandwiches on the London Tube to Camden Town  2015 Scooping greedy bites of strawberry cheesecake icecream on a Ferry in Sydney's Circular Quay  2016 Snarfing down a magazine c